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Discussion on Recent death- should I get another for companion? | |
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Member: dsmith6 |
Posted on Wednesday, Aug 19, 2009 - 12:16 pm: As in my other post- I just lost a wonderful 13 yo donkey. My horse seems to be showing recent signs of depression (not finishing grain when usually licks it clean, not laying down in stall when he used to w/ donkey). I had my horse alone, then got him the donkey for companionship. They were best friends and got along very well. As my horse is extremely arthiritic and has ulcers, (which seem to have gone away thanks to the donkey) I'm afraid my horse's health will be going south due to the recent death. should I get another donkey? Right now everyone is very upset and sad, so it will have to be a little while before everyones hearts have somewhat healed before we investigate a new companion. Our other donkey was euthanized due to extreme pain from fatty liver and founder. We are a little hesitant to get another as we had our donkey for only a short 3 months. I thought donkeys were easy keepers??? |
Moderator: DrO |
Posted on Wednesday, Aug 19, 2009 - 3:09 pm: Hello Danielle,Horses will adjust to being alone and some seem quite happy. That said I think all horse are herd animals and happiest when with other horses. Fatty Liver Disease is a problem with burros but a preventable one if you can closely control the amount and quality of the feed. If your pastures are lush you might have a bit of trouble keeping a healthy condition on the burro. DrO |
Member: brandi |
Posted on Wednesday, Aug 19, 2009 - 9:08 pm: Danielle,I'm so sorry to hear about your Donkey, I just read your other post. The suddenness of it must make it even harder. I would like to offer up my thoughts on another companion for your horse. Though your heart may not be ready, if your pocketbook can deal with it at all, there are hundreds of horses in need of a good home, due to the economy. Providing a home to one of these needy creatures, at the same time giving your arthritic horse a buddy, might make it feel "ok" intellectually, even if your heart isn't quite ready. I'm not saying this and dismissing your grief, I'm saying it would be okay not to be as emotionally invested, because I'm sure, if you get the right companion, your heart will open up when it's ready, and in the mean time your head is making decisions that you can feel good about. Does that make sense? Of course, picking the right companion is the key, a bad choice would make things very hard, but the right choice will make you feel good for your current horse, good about yourself, and maybe even have you falling in love with the newcomer sooner than you thought possible (just don't "expect" to do it, allow it when you're ready). I wish you the BEST LUCK and I wish you peace in your decision with your donkey who you tried so hard to save. |
Member: ajudson1 |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 3:51 am: Danielle,I've seen my own horses grieve when a member of the herd died. I swear they know the difference between death of a friend vs the sale of one. I think they call out good byes as one is being trailered away. And when one goes onto greener pastures, I've seen them go off their feed, and generally mope around just as your horse is doing. And when I cried in their manes, I know they felt my sorrow also. Go and cry with your horse, and talk to him. Think about a new companion during those times and see what comes to mind. It may sound way out there, but I've had moments when I just "Knew" what a horse was telling me. (((HUGS))) |
Member: canter |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 6:04 am: Danielle, not far from here, lived two horses for nearly the 13 years that I've been in the area. One was gray and the other a dark bar - In my mind, I named them Salt & Pepper as I did not know them or the owners. They were always side by side and friends have told me they were together for many years before I moved here. They were very quiet - I never saw them ramming around their pasture - and seemed content to stand in the sun, snoozing. Sadly, the gray passed away about a year ago. I drive by them nearly every day, and it was clear that the bay was very distressed by the passing of his friend. For one week, he paced and was clearly agitated. I don't know if he went off his feed, but I did not notice that he lost any condition. After that first week, he settled down again and returned to his normal self, at least from what I could observe. I did notice that the owners seemed to be with him more in the first few weeks. Now, nearly a year later, he seems very content by himself. As he's near the road, I know a lot of people walking by stop to say "hi" to him and he's always willing to oblige them by patiently letting anyone pat him on the nose and give him a scratch.While each horse is an individual, it seems to me that your horse will adjust to the loss of his friend. He just needs a little time and some extra TLC from you. |
Member: shanson |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 6:52 am: You have my condolences. I try to follow my instincts on decisions like this. If your first instinct is that you're not ready, you should wait.I'm curious... Did your horse get to see his burro friend pass away? Or, did it happen off-site? I've always wondered whether a horse handles it better if he sees his friend pass away and understands what happened. I started thinking about this when a friend of mine lost her gelding to colic. As it happened, he was euthanized right there in the barnyard. All the horses lined up at the fence and watched for a long time. I thought at the time that it must have made it easier to adjust, as opposed to the gelding being trailered off to the vet and never seen again. |
Member: dsmith6 |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 6:56 am: My horse was alone for 13 years. Just this May we decided to get a donkey for a companion, as my vet thought it was a good idea. My horse had ulcers, not eating much, severe arthiritis and seemed severly depressed. The donkey turned him around completely! I have to get him another companion- there is no way around it. I'm just not sure what, I know my heart can't handle it but I agree with Brandi (thank you Brandi!) I have to think of my horse, all emotions aside. It has to be a donkey or goat as I want an animal that can hang out with my horse in his 3-sided building. He can't stay in a stall due to his arthiritis and needs a lot of room to get up. What do you think? donkey or goat? |
Member: brandi |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 7:12 am: Danielle,I'm glad you know what you want to do. I have 2 goats that I've fallen desperately in love with. HOWEVER, take a look at your fencing, etc, as goats are much harder to keep contained - and on most properties even if you can keep them safely on-property, you might not want to give them free roaming on the whole property - not if you have any trees you like, farm equipment which you would like to keep warning labels on, plastic or paper (think seed or fertilizer bags) you don't want eaten, etc. So if your fence is already perfect to contain a goat safely within your horse's area, you might LOVE the goats. But if not, you have a project ahead of you for sure! I'm a new goat owner and we had no idea how hard it would be to keep the li'l buggars contained. I also had no idea I'd be spending an extra half hour in the barn every night with my mini-goat lying in my lap. I love it! I hope that helps. Best of luck to you and your horse is very lucky to have you. |
Member: dsmith6 |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 7:33 am: Brandi,I have a 3-railed wooden fence. I'm sure a goat could squeeze between the rails. I'm thinking if we were to get a goat- we could line the outside of it with that green coated outdoor fence material, to prevent the goat from getting loose. Can goats eat grass or should they be kept out of lush paddocks? is there anything a goat can't/shouldn't eat? Just paranoid and have to fully understand how to keep these animals (donkey or goat) that will not affect its health. I'm now thinking maybe a goat would be a better choice, not sure if my heart can handle having another donkey here. He was the best |
Member: brandi |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 10:54 am: Hi Danielle,First of all, I am a new goat owner - we got 2 nigerian dwarfs in May - so I am sure there are many who know way more than I do. But we did just as you are suggesting - the green welded wire mesh. It works great, you could decide to put a hot wire on the bottom to keep them from rubbing/scratching, but my husband didn't have the heart to shock the babies (3 mo when we got them), so they have the time of their lives rubbing along the whole length of it, and we just get to keep tightening it and putting up base boards where it's too stretched. What we've learned is that they are not overly inclined to jump "over" a fence, so excessive height is not necessary. However, they will jump up on anything and if it's close to a fence, down on the other side (young ones are amazingly proficient tree climbers (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4OKw0PxQS8). They can squeeze through extremely tight spaces for their size, so check your gates - those are the biggest challenge for us. Goats will eat a bit of grass, but they prefer clovers (too much a no-no, just like the horses), some weeds and especially trees! The big worries are ornamental plants like azaleas, camelias - I think all the rhododenDrOn family (pardon the spelling on all, not much of horticulturist), and of course anything that "kills" like nightshade and oleander. Like horses, all the literature says oaks are bad, but we all know that horses live harmoniously with oaks under most circumstances but odd weather patterns and other forage options (or lack thereof) can cause trouble. They enjoy just as much dried forage as they do green, and they love all the hay I feed (Timothy, Teff and Premium Orchard). They will eat plastic and LOVE paper - so toilet paper and paper towel holders within reach are HISTORY. Plastic can of course hurt them - it can entangle their intestines, but paper in small quantities is easily digested. They also love LMF senior feed for the horses, so for a bit of time my tiny 16" tall goats were bullying my horses out of their supplements, but I've got that worked out now. They have to have lots of water, and lots of salt, and are more sensitive to selenium deficiencies. Males stink unless they are castrated, and you don't want to castrate too young because it greatly increases the risk of bladder stones which are pretty much untreatable and deadly. We got a doe and a little buck, but ended up castrating him at 3 1/2 months because of all the reasons you castrate any young male animal. I would like to have waited until 5 months, but it was just not possible and we couldn't risk having a very young pregnant doe either! 2 does would have been easier, and our doe is our "lover" but I love Li'l Beau all the same, he's ornery and cute and has his own special place in my heart. But Li'l Belle is the snuggler, the smart one, the really challenging one. So be careful about one thing - I thought a goat would be kinda cool, a little entertaining, something my barn kids would enjoy. What I never expected was to have my heart completely stolen by these adorable creatures (who sometimes make me absolutely insane with their willfulness and mischief). They can live 15-20 years, so be prepared for that. I hope I've helped, I know I threw a lot at you - it's kind of how I roll - too wordy! But if you have any more questions I'm happy to answer. |
Member: sodmonst |
Posted on Thursday, Aug 20, 2009 - 4:17 pm: I adopted a small BLM mustang for a lonely horse. He looked like a horse, not a pony, but was about 13.2HH. He was such an entertaining little guy, tough as a boot, and ended up being gaited and a blast to ride. He also made a superb pasture buddy. |