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  Discussion on Letting one go...finding the next
Author Message
Member:
klowe

Posted on Thursday, Oct 8, 2009 - 10:34 pm:

Hi everyone, today has been a bad, bad day, and I know I will find some good advice here.

My #2 horse, Cody, approximately 22 years old, was diagnosed with cancer of some sort today. He has lost a little weight over the last six months, but is not in poor condition. But lately I noticed a gradual decrease in the volume of his urine flow, but since he never has eaten salt or consumed much water I wasn't really seriously concerned. Plus, since my other boy, Paint, is a Cushingoid horse, I just thought that the contrast with his vast quantities was making Cody's look smaller.

However, a couple of weeks ago, Cody began to dribble urine a lot of the time, without DrOpping down...almost as if he was unaware he was urinating. So I called the vet, and moved up the appointment I had for Paint to have his teeth floated. But I really thought it was probably stones in his bladder, because sometimes he would have perfectly normal urination.

Today, the vet did a rectal exam, though, the vet felt a mass. His bloodwork is "horrible" (vet's description), his hemoglobin and hematocrit are both very low, and his WBCs were below the detection limit of the vet's analyzer. The vet said, that given the magnitude of his abnormal results, it's truly astonishing how well he appears. But he doesn't think he will last more than a month or two, at most. The vet gave me the option of putting him on steroids to reduce the size of the tumor a bit, but of course his immune system is already pretty non-existent, so I don't know if that is a good idea or not.

So I need to think of how to tell when it's time to let him go on his way. He's not very friendly at the best of times, kind of a grouchy old guy who doesn't think too much of people. All I can think of is, the one thing he loves is to eat...when he doesn't come for his bucket, then I will be sure, but short of that, I don't really know. I definitely plan to have him put down by the vet, unless he jumps the gun on me. I can't bury him here, which would be my preference, because I live in the flood plain and it's against the law. Since I can't afford to cremate him, I guess I have to go with the renderers. I don't really love that idea, but I guess it's kind of another form of recycling.

Cody is not the horse I would have chosen if I had known what I was doing, but he has taught me a lot and I have tried as hard as I know how to make his life as good as it can be. Since I chose him, even for the wrong reasons, I felt it was my job to do that, and I think I have. I got him in the first place because Paint was so desperately lonely I couldn't stand it. I never really thought I would be as upset as I am at this diagnosis. Cody's not a very satisfying horse, but he's mine...

If possible, I would like to find another pasture mate now, rather than later. Cody is the boss horse, which is just fine with Paint, who is happy as long as he has company. When he doesn't (before he was mine I saw him lose a number of companions) he gets completely depressed. I don't have much money to spend, but I also would like to find a horse without significant health issues. Cody is not terribly friendly to other horses, either...

Sorry guys, my mind is all over the place tonight.
Thanks for listening & all good thoughts that I know will be arriving...

Kathy
Member:
juliem

Posted on Thursday, Oct 8, 2009 - 10:53 pm:

So sorry Kathy. I think Cody probably will let you know when he's ready, but be aware that some horses will hide their discomfort--sort of a survival technique. It sounds like Cody didn't have a very good life before you got him, but he's had that with you, so I think while you may not have needed him, but he needed you! Another companion will help you all deal with this and the rescues are overflowing. I just looked at my local craigslist listings and can't believe the number of what sounds like nice horses are at giveaway prices. And with so many available, I bet you can find one with few if any health challenges. Again, very sorry for the sad news. Julie
Member:
scooter

Posted on Thursday, Oct 8, 2009 - 10:55 pm:

Kathy I'm sorry you have to go through this, I guess we all do at some time. With 2 older horses it crosses my mind quite often.

I think like you if their appetite leaves that is a sure sign. If he does not seem to be in pain I would leave him go as long as he was comfortable and eating. Sounds like you have given Cody a good life and the understanding he needed.

I don't think most horses are happy by themselves, if paint needs a buddy there is always rescues. Horses are fairly cheap now too.

hugs to you and I hope everything goes as well as possible under the circumstances.
Member:
dsibley

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 12:17 am:

If you decide you need a pasture buddy (who is rideable but has 'issues', email me. I have one who might be perfect. And he's rideable, for someone with some experience. Good, good ground manners. Great with others...kinda low man on the totem pole. Just needs love and time. I have plenty of one, not enough of the other.
Member:
canter

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 7:22 am:

Kathy, I am very sorry about Cody's sad diagnosis. I think you will be able to tell when it is time to say goodbye. If you have doubts, your vet will likely help you make that decision.

As Julie said, there are many, many nice horses available right now for very reasonable prices. I doubt you'll have trouble finding one for Paint.

Best wishes.
Member:
rtrotter

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 8:35 am:

Kathy,

I have had personal experience with cancer in horses. They are very stoic and hide their pain well. The horse I knew was eating quite a bit had a shiny coat but had lost a considerable amount of weight even though he was eating a lot. He had been diagnosed with stomach cancer and the people that owned him tried everything to keep him alive. All of us at the farm would take shifts checking on him and the horse became a favorite of everybody for his courage.

I think it was the stress of not knowing whether they would come home to an alive or dead horse that was the turning point for putting this brave horse down, but all of us that had been a part of his 'watch crew' and realized that as much as we wanted him to live, his quality of life was really not great. All of us were there when he was humanely euthanized to spare him any more suffering.

As hard as it is to make the decision, the point comes when you realize that you are keeping your animal alive not because of him but because of you. The the decision even though hard becomes easier because his pain is your pain and you do not want him to suffer.

I do not think I would bring in another horse right now, but what I would do is locate one and explain the situation to whomever has the horse.

That way when the day comes, your new horse will be available to be a pasture mate but will not cause any undue stress to Cody during his last days.

Rachelle
Member:
annes

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 10:06 am:

Kathy, bless you for giving Cody love and a good home even though he may not have been the best choice for you. I do agree with Rachelle that another horse would cause stress at this time but you know your situation better than anyone else. Maybe you can keep them separated far enough that it would not upset Cody. I will be thinking of you and wish you luck finding the perfect partner for you and Paint.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 10:59 am:

Thanks everyone, for your kind words. I have had some experience, with dogs & cats, in deciding to euthanize. I hate hate HATE it, but I do see it as part of my responsibility. I can't stand to see any kind of critter suffering, so I know I will do what has to be done. It's just too bad that the logistics are so complicated here, I had thought I could just bury him, didn't think about the flood plain and high water table...

One of my concerns is that I kinda jumped into becoming Cody's owner because I couldn't bear Paint's anxiety/loneliness...actually bought him sight-unseen on the internet. I think his former owner was honest but inexperienced and had owned him only for 6 months. I knew he had arthritis, but she described him as "bombproof" while I came to see him as sort of frozen, neglected if not abused. All of which is why I had thought of getting a new one prior to Cody's demise...I have a low tolerance for Paint's fear and depression while on his own, so I wouldn't feel so pressed to rush into something.

I don't know a whole lot about herd dynamics, these are my first two horses. Paint is submissive and Cody is dominant, so I guess the combo could've been worse. Paint is perfectly happy being herded around, which seems to be one of Cody's joys in life. I mean, neither looks enthralled, exactly, but after watching them for the past few years I believe they are comfortable in these roles. (Come to think of it, that will be another sign, if Cody loses interest in telling Paint where to stand.

I do have a separate fenced in area where I could leave a new buddy for a few weeks...as long as they are all agreeing to it, it's not the stoutest fence. I could do that and maybe judge by Cody's behavior. Possibly another horse willing to not be top horse wouldn't be too distressing for him. Paint welcomes them all, we've had a few strays over the years who decide the neighborhood has horses, it must be good. Paint rushes over to say hi, Cody will patrol the premises and bite them on the ear if they come too close.

I have also thought of a mini...they are so adorable, and if I am too busy working to support all the critters to really ride, then at least minis are less expensive to feed! I don't know that Cody would be distressed by something that small...

dieliz, I will email you about your situation, I am still trying to consider all possibilities logically, as much as I can.

You guys are great! I joined to be able to ask questions and acquire practical information...I really never expected to find so many kindred spirits.
Member:
erika

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 11:31 am:

Such a terrible decision to have to make, Kathy. I'm sorry you are facing it.

I have observed that three is a tough number for a herd. IMO, adding a horse now will stress Cody even more, and probably wouldn't be a very warm welcome for the new horse either. If I were in your situation, I night consider putting Cody down sooner rather than waiting until he is in obvious difficulty. If you know the outcome, why prolong it to the point of pain, you know? You could have the other horse ready to come at your convenience that way.

I guess in NM you could consider a mini for a companion because you don't have our lush pastures. Never thought I'd envy someone without, but here you could never leave a mini in with a full size horse or they would blimp out. I prefer to have horses that can share similar amounts of feed to keep things simple. But then again, as they age, they are never simple anyway, are they?

Good luck on your journey. It is such a hard thing, but you know it is the kindest to prevent suffering. So sorry.
Erika
Member:
klowe

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 12:01 pm:

Erika, I hear what you are saying, along with some of the other folks. It's somewhat of a logistical nightmare, to arrange for a new buddy to arrive at the right moment, but truthfully I was thinking more of Paint (who's my equine baby) than Cody. I don't want to stress him out, and if he's too far gone to object, then I will have waited too long, period.

And if I can find Paint's new buddy, then I probably will opt for not waiting any longer than it takes for him or her to arrive. At one point, I thought Cody was mellowing, he has allowed more contact with less objection, but perhaps really he had just entered his long, slow decline...sad thought, given that I was congratulating myself...I kept telling myself that sick horses don't get friendlier.

Plus, I really hate the thought of the end occurring when I'm gone, although my partner gets home from worka couple hours after I leave, he's not really a horse person and he doesn't always know what he is seeing.

For sure, no lush pasture here! What I have is mostly weeds, a few poisonous that fortunately the (well-fed) horses don't touch. There are a few scraps of lawn left where I feed them, and which they keep mowed to a golf-green consistency.
Are minis just like regular horses, only smaller?

Kathy
Member:
leslie1

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 12:33 pm:

Big Huggs Kathy and Cody and Paint
Member:
lilo

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 1:35 pm:

Kathy - when I first read your post, tears came to my eyes and I could not respond. We lost my daughter's much beloved gelding to cancer - he was only 16 years old, and beloved by all. We had his tumor (on the left side of his head, about the location of the lymph glands) removed and that bought him another year. After that, he declined rapidly - finally could not eat anymore. My daughter (a cancer survivor herself) made the hard decision to have him euthanized.

So - in his case it was not eating anymore. It was so very sad ....

I feel for you, Kathy. My mare was left alone for some time, but adjusted quickly. I know that you are worried for Paint, who seems to crave company.

If you want to get a mini for a companion, I just want to warn you that some of the fencing that is perfectly adequate for a horse might not hold a mini. We had some neighbors whose mini was an escape artist and it took a long time before they had "mini proofed" their pasture.

All the best to you - these are the tough decisions we animal owners are called upon to make.

Lilo
Member:
klowe

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 2:01 pm:

Thanks, Lilo- my sympathies to you and your daughter, too.

Maybe I am anthropmorphizing (? I know that's wrong) or maybe it depends on the horse. When Paint belonged to my former landlord, first his lost his pasture buddy and I watched him run around frantically, calling, which was very painful. Then he attached to a herd of horses on the other side of the fence in the next pasture. One day after an absence I went to visit him, and he was so depressed I could hardly get his attention...the other horses had been moved at some point. I had taught him to come when I called, and I had to work hard to get him to pay attention again. I felt terrible. (Shoulda known at that point that he was mine!)

When I bought him and moved him here with me, he was clearly very lonely...standing for hours gazing at the horses he could probably hear across a big field. Otherwise eating my porch! He stopped cribbing as soon as Cody arrived.

Thoughts, anyone, on male vs. female? All of my experience is with these geldings. Most of the horse ads that I have found thus far (in my very limited price range) are either really young or 20+. I have no experience with green horses, am worried that this is not a very horse-proof place for a young, curious critter; now I'm also afraid of the health issues of the older ones, which I was not before because I didn't know I should be!

Let's just say I really, really don't want to go through this again very soon. Paint is probably 30, so even w/o the Cushings I know he won't last forever. My two dogs are 11...and so it goes...

Kathy
Member:
paardex

Posted on Friday, Oct 9, 2009 - 2:35 pm:

You know Kathy if you could keep a new horse separated next to the others I don't think it will put that much undue stress on Cody [it worked fine for me with fi broodmares who needed to foal out while there companion couldn't stay alone] If I were you I would lend a horse for a while and look for a real new one for yourself calmly. Yopu deserve one thats all you want just as horses deserve a place to live. Try shelters or TB rescues or even stables that use there horses most for tourists during summer if they do not want to 'park' one for a while with you. You can always decide to keep it if it is a suitable horse.
Jos
PS More then enough horses of intermediate age over here nearly for free and I just saw the most accomplished two year old coming from Reno University she would have done excellent to. You just need time and put out the word and tell all HA'ers what you would REALLY like to have for yourself
Member:
cheryl

Posted on Saturday, Oct 10, 2009 - 8:50 am:

Kathy - have you checked for any horse rescue groups in your general vicinity. They usually have horses needing to be adopted - have no idea what the adoption fee would be - but you would probably end up with a really cool horse and help out the rescue at the same time - plus make room for them to take in another rescue.
Cheryl K
Member:
klowe

Posted on Saturday, Oct 10, 2009 - 12:36 pm:

Hi guys, I am listening and thinking and trying to process it all. After a long morning yesterday looking at horse ads, I had to take a break...less weepy by the afternoon, although I ended up with a batch of very very hot spaghetti sauce because I found myself standing there on another planet while shaking and shaking the crushed red pepper into the stockpot! Oh well, it is what it is...don't like to cook & so try to make really big freezer batches of stuff.

This is my fall vacation and it pretty much sucks!
But in a way I'm glad to have this all come down while I don't have to go to work and try to concentrate on that.

Erika, I'm curious why you think 3 is not a good herd number? For some reason, I had it in my head that it would actually be better, although from my dog experience I do know that adding a third seems to be kind of a geometric increase, rather than just an arithmetic progression.

I am, however, coming down on the side of it being stressful for Cody to add another at this point. He is very dominant and territorial. He has favorite places in the front & back yards to be at particular times of the day (mainly dependent on available shade) and I hate to restrict him if it isn't necessary for his well-being, such as it is. So wherever I find the new buddy, they will have to be folks who understand my dilemma and are willing to work w/me.

I'm kind of fuming right now...I discovered yesterday it will cost $500 or thereabouts to euthanize him/dispose of the body. Plus tax, adding insult to injury.

Jos, thanks for your thoughts. I am mentally putting together my "perfect horse" description and will post it when I get it straight in my head. But it's a helpful question, and I think it will help me keep from rushing out and buying the first one that appeals to me for emotional reasons.

So many thanks again, everyone.

Kathy
Member:
paardex

Posted on Saturday, Oct 10, 2009 - 7:40 pm:

On the three horse issue: We would always put three together instead of two especially with male because as an old farmer put it "one can rest while the other two play' Read: the dominant one will dominate over two which is less tiring. BUT we put them together all three at the same time. If you add one being from three to four or two to three I think it is more difficult. I know it sounds silly but imo if someone would lend you a pair of horses for a while that could very well be less stressful and less fighting then if you add one.
Still this way you will end up with a herd. I still think you will do best to just go slow and look for YOUR perfect horse and in case of necessity you really will find a friend for the leftover horse in a very short time!
One other thing, I am afraid I am going to step on a lot of toes but I would not immediately go to a rescue, if you are a bit like me you will fall for a 'sad case' take it home and obviously love it but perhaps not enjoy as much riding as you could. If you buy carefully a lot of sellers at this moment will be helped to. The market is bad and a lot of people have to size down. I would say: don't feel guilty if you do not immediately rescue in the end it will help the entire market no matter where you 'shop' GET WHAT YOU WOULD LOVE TO HAVE!
This being said ofcourse it IS very well possible that you will find your perfect horse in a Rescue.
Speaking from experience though whenever I lost or had to put down an animal I often ended up with a not so perfect animal for me perhaps feeling guilty about what I had decided? Don't know but I would ask you just to consider the above and really no offense meant to the people who do so much work in and for Rescues.
Jos
Member:
erika

Posted on Saturday, Oct 10, 2009 - 8:19 pm:

I see Jos' point about the three, I was just referring to my experiences with three at a time here on my farm. Nothing too heavy... It seems like I have often had three here and invariably one is kind of picked on and shunned by the others. But it could be just the individual personalities, too.
Some kids play well in groups, and some can only handle on friend at a time. I guess hosses are the same!
Member:
rtrotter

Posted on Saturday, Oct 10, 2009 - 9:44 pm:

Erika,

My trick for putting a new horse in with an already existing horses is to switch the two old friends to a different paddock that already contains the new horse and try to do it on the same day.

The horses spend so much time investigating their new home that they don't usually pay attention to each other and if they do, its usually minimal. After a few days you can put them all back in the other paddock.

Jos, while I agree you can buy something you will absolutely love, if you go to a legitimate rescue, they try and match you with a horse you will love and if it doesn't work out, you can return the horse and pick a new one. The rescues, want both the humans and the horses to go to the best match they can, that will hopefully be forever.

Rachelle
Member:
paardex

Posted on Saturday, Oct 10, 2009 - 10:59 pm:

Rachelle I do not disagree with you but how many of us send the horse back and get another one if the match isn't perfect? I even keep/kept horses that came temporarily if I thought they would be hard to place elsewhere[perhaps unjustly] and especially seem prone to do that after losing one.
Jos
Member:
rtrotter

Posted on Sunday, Oct 11, 2009 - 11:01 am:

Jos,

I have been into horses since I was six, I have had 1 horse in all that time that I felt was perfect for me. All the rest of them came with a variety of problems, that I solved( with help, of course) and then they became almost perfect horses for me or someone else. In fact, a lot of the horses that became my favorites started out as horses I did not like and they grew on me after their attitude problems were resolved.

SO perfect in one person's mind is not necessarily perfect in another's.

I do not tend to trust anyone else's judgement except my own, I have seen too many problems with people describing their horses as perfect only to get them home and find out they were very far from the truth.

I guess my attitude has a lot to do with the fact that just about every animal I have had came from a rescue or had so many problems that their owners couldn't do anything with them. So, that sways my opinion away from buying instead of adopting, especially in this case.

Rachelle
Member:
klowe

Posted on Sunday, Oct 11, 2009 - 1:16 pm:

Hi all, I am still going through many ups and downs, or course. I started looking at horses yesterday.

Went and talked to a guy who used to have a guest ranch which he has closed. Has gone from 42 horses (MO fox trotters) to 24, needs to get down to 6. I liked 2 in particular, but one is a 9 y.o. mare who's not broken to saddle yet. The other is a gelding, which might be easier on my "herd." Also I am getting OK at caring for geldings, don't know anything about mares, heats, etc. Do they have more complicated health issues than males due to their more complicated plumbing?

Anyhow, the MFT is just a nice, 10 y.o. horse, well broken. The guy clearly loves them, many have been born & raised there, some he is keeping because they are so old that he thinks they deserve to be there until the end. Prices are reduced from $3500 to $500. Or so he says, might be true. He also was pushing giving me lessons, not going to happen...he lives 1/2 hour away, I don't have a trailer, etc.

But he made an offer re: Cody. To take him up there for less than the vet/renderer and bury him, regardless of whether I buy a horse from him. The catch is that he would have to be shot, unless I want to pay for the vet (we have the same one) to go up there and euthanize. Claims he has a ranch hand who has expertise, but I really don't know. I feel I should be there, he may not like me much, but I'm familiar and I don't feel right sending him off w/strangers to die...not sure I could tolerate being there for shooting. I know there is a thread here somewhere on handgun euthanasia, just haven't had a chance to look it up.

Jos, Rachelle...I like the idea of adoption, although I think I don't meet all their fairly strict criteria. And I don't think I could ever get rid of a horse (or dog or cat, for that matter) unless I believed they had a really physically dangerous problem. I get attached easily, or I think that I can help them adjust, or feel no-one else will want them, or something...

Going this afternoon to see the 1st horse who sounded really good...https://www.dreamhorse.com/show_horse.php?form_horse_id=1462127. Only obvious drawback is it needs a quick decision.

My perfect horse: smart, with personality... Rideable, but also suitable to just being a horse as my time/energy are limited. Probably older but not w/too many obvious, imminent health problems. Not very expensive. Nearby. Probably a gelding.

I will let you know how it goes.

Thanks again for all the support, advice, good questions, common sense, etc...

Kathy
Member:
scooter

Posted on Sunday, Oct 11, 2009 - 3:02 pm:

Kathy he is cute, and part arab to boot. Can't wait to hear your report.

No suggestions for Cody, I think you have to decide what to do as far as euth, whatever you are comfortable with will work. I have never been able to attend my horses euth, even when the vet does it, hubby usually takes care of that part because I can't stand it. I have never felt guilty for not being there, that is not the last memory I want of them. Some people like to be there for the horse, so it's all a matter of what you feel comfortable with, and a very personal decision.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Sunday, Oct 11, 2009 - 9:12 pm:

Well, I have found my "perfect" horse, I think. He was very beautiful, appeared to move extremely well with no lameness due to the fused hock (and this is a purported natural fusion, w/o his ever having been obviously lame). He puts my rusty, dust-covered riding skills to shame...when I can come up with the cash I will have to take some lessons! His owner is clearly gaga about him, the only reason she is selling him is that she is moving to PA and cannot afford to board 2 there. She's keeping the other mainly due to the mare being a rescue horse whom she has rehabbed, she doesn't feel comfortable sending her away. Which I can understand.

Tomorrow we are going to get our vets are going to consult, NM really being one large small town, population-wise, the two are friends.

The drawbacks I have mentioned before. It has to be very, very quick. This gal is packing her stuff on Wednesday, leaving on Thursday. (I don't get paid til Friday, but she seems OK w/that.) So we pretty much have to do it Tuesday.

Which still leaves me with my Cody dilemma. I have decided that I can't take or send him to be shot, although I think the offer was kindly meant and would in fact save me some money. But I have been present for my other animals' euthanasias, and although I can understand people not wanting/being able to do it, I have always felt it to be part of my responsibilities.

Cody doesn't seem all that different than he ever does, just skinnier and dribbling urine all over himself. Still loves to eat, still herds Paint around. Hawk and he are both used to being boss horse, and while I can keep them separate to some extent, I don't know how stressful it will be for Cody.

So I think I have only 2 choices...one, to euthanize immediately. Or 2, to start the Presnisolone and see if that has any immediate positive impact, and to bring in the new boy and observe what happens.

You know, in a way it'd be easier if I really loved Cody the way I love Paint...then I wouldn't have to wonder so much about whether my motives are pure...

Kathy
Member:
frances

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 4:18 am:

That's such good news that you've found a horse you really like! And sometimes it's a good thing when you have to make a decision within a short time limit - gets you to really focus. Hopefully your vet will manage to come out in time.

It sounds a little unusual to me that his hock would fuse without any previous lameness - thought it was pain and inflammation that gradually caused the fusion - but anyway now that it HAS fused, the problem has been resolved.

The Cody situation is very sad and difficult for you, but I'm sure you'll see your way to doing the best thing for all. Little changes in his situation and yours will point the way. I know what you mean about doubting your own motives! But you've always taken good care of him it seems even though he's not the most lovable of horses, so please don't feel bad whatever you decide.

Good luck!
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 10:20 am:

Thanks, LL. You are right. In the meantime I will just be driving myself crazy, with ifs-thens, whys, why nots.

I had similar trouble deciding the fate of an old cat I had for 17 years. I did love him, but he grew from a cute kitten to a kind of crazy cat (particularly after being neutered) and I can't say I really liked him all that much. He had horrible diarrhea for like a year before the vet diagnosed him as hyperthyroid, and I had to choose whether to give him $3 per day meds. I finally decided not, but it was hard.

On the other hand, it was not too hard to decide NOT to put one of my all-time great dogs in an oxygen tent, run EKGs etc...he was 15 1/2. I couldn't subject him to that.

Maybe it is really a question of an acute situation vs. a bad but not imminent one. Hadn't thought of that before. In a crisis, I can decide right then based on general principles. In my current situation I am just thinking myself to death!

Kathy
Member:
mrose

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 10:51 am:

Kathy, I would quite thinking so much and just go with your instincts. You'll know when the time is right. It's never easy; even when you know it's the right thing to do.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 11:07 am:

You are no doubt right, Sara...now if I could just find that "OFF" button to my brain!

Kathy
Member:
hpyhaulr

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 11:22 am:

By design, the brain button is ON/OFF. It has no volume. When your gut out-shouts your brain you will know it is time for the final act of friendship.Hence the term; no brainer.
Trust your gut.Cody is counting on you for that.
Our hearts are with you. We send you cyber hugs and collective courage. Both with bungee cords attached.For one day, you will do the same for all of us!
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 12:06 pm:

Thanks, Cyndy. That is helpful. I am feeling bad for Cody, of course, he really doesn't seem to have had a great life. And also, I am feeling kinda sorry for myself...every time I think life might settle into normalcy (for awhile), something jumps up and smacks me in the face.

As I have said often, I think I picked Cody for many wrong reasons, and had I been able to forsee that (not counting his current illness) I probably wouldn't have done it. But he IS mine, and I have come to think of him as a horse who has taught me a great deal. Paint is so very different, after a month w/him I thought "well, this is really pretty easy!" And then along comes Cody...

All that aside, I really believed he'd be here for years to come. And that if I continued to work with him, he'd come around eventually. Sigh.

You guys are helping me not to get too crazy, thanks you so much.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 3:01 pm:

Well, now the deal for Hawk has fallen apart. His owner has decided he needed a full time job and has promised him to the local therapeutic riding school. She didn't even have the courtesy to let me know, she waited until I contacted her!

Some days as far as people go, I much prefer animals!

Perhaps it's for the best though. He probably WAS too much horse for me, but I thought I could grow into him. And I didn't like having to make an instant decision. And so the search continues.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Oct 12, 2009 - 8:56 pm:

I have to say that having HA available, where I can work through this stuff with input from folks who know what it's all about...has been invaluable. (Thank you Dr.O for making it happen!) I have looked at other forums, but the caliber of people here is just outstanding, there's no comparison.

I am starting to calm down, finally. I decided I can't put Cody down prior to his getting worse. Since he continues to engage in his favorite activies, he seems as contented as he is capable of being. Doing it now would either be because I want to make room for the next horse, or to relieve my own anxieties, and neither of those seems right.

I had a talk with my vet (who's also a friend of the guy who offered to bury Cody, toldya NM is one big small town...!) and he believes that done properly, euthanasia by shooting is actually painless and humane. He also said that probably I shouldn't be there, no matter how it's done, that horse euthanisia is not like watching a dog or cat go to sleep peacefully.

So I will wait for the right cue from Cody, and continue to look at horses. Picking pets is sort of a dice throw anyhow. I have gotten fabulous dogs from both breeders and shelters, and not so fabulous ones, too.

So thanks again, everyone, I will keep you posted.

Kathy
Member:
frances

Posted on Tuesday, Oct 13, 2009 - 7:33 am:

Hi Kathy, Sorry to hear the Hank deal is a no-go. People can be unbelievable!

Glad to hear you're feeling calmer about the situation, though. I'm sure that things will resolve themselves, that Cody will show you when the time has come and in the meantime you can look into finding another horse in a leisurely way. Don't panic, and don't be hard on yourself!
Member:
cheryl

Posted on Tuesday, Oct 13, 2009 - 8:53 am:

Kathy - you said that Cody likes to eat - Have you ever tried clicker training with him? I had a TB rescue mare - have no idea how she was treated - just knew she was absolutely terrified of people. I did two sessions of training with her and she turned into a totally different horse - she no slammed into the back of the stall to get away from me when I walked into the barn - she actually started nickering at feeding time. I'm still astounded at the change it made for her. Just wish I had thought of it 10 years earlier. It might be a way for you to make his last days a lot happier - for both of you.
I know what you are going through - just wish there were a way to make it a little easier.
Smile - Lady
This is a mare I had to walk down every time I needed to catch her.
Cheryl K
Member:
klowe

Posted on Tuesday, Oct 13, 2009 - 9:55 am:

Cheryl, Cody responds to food every time, and since his appetite is still very good I am continuing to use that. Aside from deciding to wait for the "right" time for euthanasia, one of the things that helped me to decide to do the Prednisolone is that I can crush up all those tablets and mix them w/apple juice and pour it over his feed...he eats it right up, no problems. (If he doesn't like the smell or taste of something, however, he behaves as if I am trying to poison him-- sniffs, snorts, backs away and tried to get after Paint's feed. Also doesn't like his food too gooped up, must be a texture thing!) Recently I finally did learn to do pastes, but Cody is one of those guys who resents it, holds it in his mouth forever, and I just didn't want my last days with him to consist of struggling to force medicines down him. So that's a relief.

I'd like a little more input on herd dynamics, although obviously all horses are individuals. I know in the wild generally mares are bosses. I am going to look at this horse today: https://www.horseville.com/php/view.php?id=228847
She has an old bowed tendon per her owner:
"Luna is a healthy horse for any age. However, she has an old bowed tendon in front from Back In The Day that makes her achy now and again and she does well with a Glucosamine supplement. Her vet says the best remedy is moderate exercise, ride her on the flat, and don't let her stagnate or confine her to a stall.

She isn't too mare-ish, but being a mare she does have her hormonal issues. You will find that she lactates at times. Her vet says not to fuss with her teets or you'll encourage milk production, just make the effort to keep her clean and dry when you groom her (which she LOVES)."

I know nothing about mares. As Cody is the dominant male and Paint could care less, could bringing in a mare work, I wonder. I know no-one can predict, but I am curious as to your experiences.

My big, big problem is that since I was little, I will basically fall in love w/every horse I see, near or far. When I was really small we used to play at being horses! In my family, we call people like me (and many of you) horsegirls...

Here's another: https://www.equine.com/horses-for-sale/horse-ad-855122.html?sr=1&state_ids=31&reg ion_ids=31&breed_ids=177&ltid=0. He was very sweet, haven't ridden him yet, not the top horse...maybe I could bring him here and he would accept Cody as boss horse? A gaited horse is getting appealing to my older bones!

All ideas are welcome, most of you folks know way, way more than I do.
Member:
cheryl

Posted on Tuesday, Oct 13, 2009 - 11:04 am:

Not a fair question - I had a 1/2 Saddlebred gelding that was the greatest horse there ever was or ever will be - and I love paints. If the foxtrotter is what they say he is - he could make a good horse for you.
Until we had to put Lady down I had two mares and a gelding - Lady spent most of her time protecting my gelding from my other mare. Don't know if that is normal herd dynamics or not - a mare with two geldings will probably leave Paint on the outside looking in. Not much help, I know.
Cheryl K
Member:
erika

Posted on Tuesday, Oct 13, 2009 - 11:35 am:

Yeah, me too on the Saddlebred fan. The two best horses I ever rode were my Saddlebred mare, and a half-saddlebred horse that the old colonel used to let me ride sometimes when I was a kid. It was his favorite horse, too.

I think horse relationships can be as baffling as human ones. In the hunt field it's kind of funny to see that some horses instantly bond and want to run together, and others get the cold shoulder over nothing obvious.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Tuesday, Oct 13, 2009 - 11:47 am:

The good news is, Cody seems to be urinating somewhat better, so even 3 doses of presnisolone has helped, even if it's a temporary thing.

The bad news is that the paint-x owner just called me, she's sold. THIS owner was very nice, though, unlike the other who was nice but kinda flakey. Not to offend anyone, but the gal who said yes and then no to me believes in horse psychics. (My sister consults some sort of health psychic, which I think is also odd, but that's a whole 'nother story...)

I have seen the foxtrotter but not ridden him, hope to do that today now that the mare isn't an option. I have little-to-no skill at telling how old a horse he is, but he seems very sweet, not spiritless, but not the top horse in the herd, either. My vet is that owner's friend & their horse vet and he thinks one of their MFTs might be a good choice, not sure that he remembers this exact horse, though.

What a rollercoaster ride this is...thanks for all the handholding!

Kathy
Member:
klowe

Posted on Thursday, Oct 15, 2009 - 11:41 am:

Hi everyone...I went and found me the next way faster than expected, at the last place I expected. I was attempting to set up a time w/the MFT, but couldn't get the guy. Being too antsy to just wait, I gritted my teeth & went to see the local horse trader. I was expecting a kind of animal pound-type atmosphere, and instead what I discovered was a very nice place, well-cared for horses and a great old guy who seemed truly interested in the welfare of both humans and horses, and in matching the right pair.



His name, tentatively, is Rio del Suenos (River of Dreams), to be called Rio of course. He's a lot bigger than I had been thinking of (trying to be practical) but truthfully I like great big solid horses, I'll just need a horse ladder to climb aboard. He's very mellow, not the top horse in the herd. Left to their own devices, I think he and Paint would already be buddies, but of course Cody won't allow that yet.

It's been a long time since the two old guys ran around like that. Due to their arthritis and Cody's illness, I decided to separate them. Cody has calmed down some, but in the meantime he has convinced Paint that the new guy is dangerous.

This is the beginning of day 3. I am feeding them within sight of one another, not too closely so I don't incite food competition. Cody and Paint will stand in sight of Rio- the 1st afternoon Cody kept Paint pinned to the fence as far away as the could get. I can lead Paint over to Rio's fence and they have touched noses (while Cody is penned).

From what I have read, the next step might be to put Cody and Rio together, and when they calm down, add Paint? Any advice is welcome.

Kathy
Member:
cheryl

Posted on Friday, Oct 16, 2009 - 8:55 am:

He is a beautiful boy, Kathy - you did good! What breed is he?
I'm not sure I would put them all three together - I would put Paint in with Rio and then turn him back out with Cody - and just keep that up until Cody is gone. That way Cody gets to keep his "King of the Realm" status and Paint and Rio will have time to establish their relationship. I would hate to see Cody get his butt kicked along with everything else he is facing. Maybe you could give Cody some real nice alfalfa with oats sprinkled through it to munch up while Paint is in with Rio. That's just the way I would handle it - have no idea if it's the correct way or not.
Cheryl K
Member:
annes

Posted on Friday, Oct 16, 2009 - 10:32 am:

I agree to not rush putting them together. The last time I got a new horse it was 6 weeks before they were all turned out together and then it was in a 10 acre field. By that time, they were more interested in the grass and hardly noticed they were all together. I am extra cautious because of an incident years ago (new horse kicked and broke jaw of my TB and they were all barefoot too). In my opinion, you cannot be too careful introducing a new horse. If you could continue to keep Cody separated and still keep him happy, I'd go that route. Good luck - Rio is a beautiful boy and I am so happy you found each other!
Member:
leslie1

Posted on Friday, Oct 16, 2009 - 11:10 am:

OOOO I love his nose! hes beautiful dahling:-)
Member:
klowe

Posted on Friday, Oct 16, 2009 - 12:02 pm:

Thanks, I don't know his breed, but I will certainly agree that he's beautiful! After I walked him around the pen- halter and bareback- he sat stock still with me on his back for more than 10 minutes while I was calling to see if the vet could squeeze him in for a basic prepurchase exam. The horse guy said he was watching the horse while I was on the phone, and he looked completely relaxed. If the horse guy is honest, and I felt he was, he had been asking $2800 a few days prior. I paid $800- he said he had made enough on the other horses in the deal to be able to DrOp the price...who knows? He didn't say it until after I'd already agreed to pay the $800.

Never could get the vet. For horses at this price, no one wants to wait on an exam, I've found. Think I will have my very experienced farrier come take a look and make sure I didn't buy a 40 y.o. horse who needs braces and corrective lenses. The horse guy swears up & down, he will trade any horse he has sold anytime if you are unhappy...of course, it's now way too late for that!

So you guys are thinking I should put Rio and Paint together 1st? It's true, that as long as Cody is eating, he seems unconcerned about Paint being over near Rio's fence. I don't know how he would react if it were a prolonged visit.

My thoughts were that if I put Rio and Cody together, Cody would then become the boss of Rio and Rio would be part of Cody's herd.

At least during the first encounters, Rio always backed down (and this was probably true in his previous life, he has bite marks on his butt to prove it, according the the horse dealer).

Anyhow, I am going to leave it as is for another couple of days. My schedule and that of my partner don't coincide until the weekend, and although Kevin's not a horse guy, at least he can open & shut the gate if need be.

Rio now knows my car. I pulled up at midnight after work, and I am used to the other guys greeting me, but Rio gave a big whinny...of course, since I feed their last hay when I get home, they are pretty much always happy to see me!
Member:
klowe

Posted on Friday, Oct 16, 2009 - 1:55 pm:

Good news! I was out in back with Rio a while ago, doing some yard chores, and I heard Rio let out a big whinny. When I looked over, he and Paint were visiting over the fence. They touched noses, sniffed one other as far as they could reach, and then stood for a bit. Cody was about 200 ft. down the driveway in one of his shady spots, and he didn't seem to care at all.

So maybe it wasn't me who was being greeted last night, but the other horses. Which is perfectly OK.
Tomorrow or Sunday, I will put Cody where Rio is now (and which contains his favorite tree), and let Rio & Paint spend some time together. I'll let you know how it goes.

Kathy
Member:
maggienm

Posted on Friday, Oct 16, 2009 - 2:11 pm:

Hi Kathy,

Congrats on your new horse, he sounds great.

I have bought and sold a few horses and it is my experience that every meet and greet is different.

One time when a new horse arrived and i wasn't home my husband allowed the new horse to go directly into the one acre pasture with the other horses.
When I got home later that day they were all grazing quietly, no injuries anywhere.

A different time I brought in a new mare every thing was quiet for two maybe three days then bam, suddenly she asserted herself and the pecking order changed.

Take precautions but don't be surprised if hooves fly at some point.
My biggest concern is that there is room for the horses to move out of each others way and not get trapped in a corner.
Member:
lilo

Posted on Saturday, Oct 17, 2009 - 9:35 am:

Congratulations, Kathy. I hope the new herd dynamics work out for you, without any major fights.

Yes - never having bought a horse without a vet check, I also hope that all the basics check out.

Good luck,
Lilo
Member:
hpyhaulr

Posted on Saturday, Oct 17, 2009 - 11:57 am:

Kathy, folks,
I will be watching this thread even more closely now... my favorite hauler will be home in a couple of hours with my newest paint, Rio (how's that for blended coincidence, Kathy??? lol I love when you take your time to bring a new kid into the herd and it works.
Member:
mrose

Posted on Saturday, Oct 17, 2009 - 12:26 pm:

Off topic, but Cyndy, where is Rio from?
Member:
klowe

Posted on Saturday, Oct 17, 2009 - 12:48 pm:

Awesome, Cyndy, let me know how it goes! Paint is my only experience w/paints, but he is such a sweet boy that I am now prejudiced in their favor. And my Rio's name comes from the fact that when I was sitting on his back on a beautiful October New Mexico Day, all I could think of was that he really was the horse I had dreamed of when I was a little girl...hence the name (if I have gotten my Spanish right). He didn't come to me with a name at all.

My herd politics seem to be going quite well. Cody is now seeming to take Rio for granted unless there happens to be food too close to the gate (no matter which side), in which case Rio gets warned off by the head-down-ears back routine.

I haven't seen it yet, but Kevin said last night he saw the 2 (Cody & Rio)about 5 feet apart, talking. Paint & Rio are visitng over the fence regularly.

Rio is getting more confident. At 1st he stuck to a small area between the gate and the water trough, and where I feed. But he has been getting more exploratory. Poor guy, he really wants to be with the others. But he will have to wait until tomorrow when I have time to think it all through and deal w/ the consequences.

Kathy
Member:
scooter

Posted on Saturday, Oct 17, 2009 - 7:37 pm:

Kathy I hope Rio works out wonderfully for you, he sounds like a perfect match, and he's cute! Sounds like you are introducing the herd well. When I get a new horse I usually put Hank in with them first, he is the boss, but if his "herd" isn't in with them he has always gotten along fine, then introduced the other 2...they get along with everybody.

Good Luck
Member:
klowe

Posted on Sunday, Oct 18, 2009 - 3:11 pm:

Update on horse politics: due to all the great HA advice, my horse intros/transition has (so far) gone very smoothly.

First of all, I put Paint in w/Rio while Cody was still penned with hay. They instantly began to eat hay head-to-head. It was really old hay destined for the compost after having been picked thru by chickens. Both would ordinarily turned their noses up at it, so maybe it was a symbolic meal?

Cody was looking anxiously for the others, so we let him out of his pen after around 1/2 hour. He came over and stood quietly by the fence to the back yard, so we held our breaths and let him inside. He did have to make sure Rio knew he was the boss, but no outright violence...yet, just ears-back and herding. Rio is allowed on the periphery. All seem reasonably content.

So thanks to you all for input and good advice!

Now the question remains for Cody, when where & how, which no one (except perhaps Cody) can resolve for me...Not really happy with the logistics or price of any of my alternatives...don't seem to be any other answers, though.

Kathy
Member:
cheryl

Posted on Monday, Oct 19, 2009 - 8:48 am:

Good Job, Kathy - As far as Cody goes - I'm sure you will know when you need to step in. A common practice here(ID) as well as in ND is to take any large animal that dies out to an area frequented by coyotes. The thought makes me cringe but it is Nature's way of processing the dead and probably better than being consumed by worms I've had to put down two horses and I so know what you are going through. I also know that doesn't help you but at least you know there are many of us here who know just exactly what you are feeling.
Cheryl K
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Oct 19, 2009 - 11:23 am:

Thanks, Cheryl- I actually don't mind so much what you are suggesting. Where I used to live was further away from civilization & everyone out there used to dump dead cows out in the bosque (woods by the river/irrigations ditches). Probably it was illegal as all get-out, but it didn't seem as bad to me as some of the alternatives, I just didn't like my dogs messing with cow bodies.

I keep telling myself the renderer is also just another way to recycle, and intellectually it makes sense to me, but emotionally I have some difficulty with it. Not to mention the fact that I have to pay 'em to do it! I keep hoping in a way that Cody will take it out of my hands before he loses his appetite & desire to be boss horse, just lie down one day & not wake up. Then I would still have to dispose of him, but at least I wouldn't have to decide whether a shot or a gun is the best, and when to have it done. I can probably find someone local to shoot him, but how do I know they really know what they're doing?

Arrgh! I am so tired of thinking about it, if I could just find that OFF button...I tell myself that I will just do what I have to do whenever the time comes, and to quit dissecting it, but of course that doesn't work very well.

In the meantime, all three of the boys are hanging out in the same general area, with Cody keeping Rio a little further away than he keeps Paint, often between the two. Rio is certainly happier, even on the periphery, than in his separate area. The last day I kept them apart, he was beginning to get very upset when the two would get out of his sight...I was beginning to get fear for both him & my fence!

Thanks for all the kind words & advice, it really has been very helpful...

Kathy
Member:
klowe

Posted on Sunday, Nov 22, 2009 - 10:53 pm:

I just wanted to let everyone know that I have scheduled the vet to come and take care of Cody tomorrow.

He has done pretty well, overall, he is still the boss of the herd, but this week I have been able to see that he is just winding down. He has been lying down many times during the day, which is not normal for him...losing weight although still eating with great enjoyment. He dribbles urine on his hind legs/hooves most of the time, which would have been a problem in a less dry climate.

Mostly I am afraid that if I let it go much longer, some crisis will come when I am not around to deal with it, or Thanskgiving day, or something of that sort. He has never seemed to be in pain or disturbed, just slower and tireder. So I feel that the time is as right as I am going to be able to judge it.

Rio has become quite attached to him-- something, of course, that I hadn't considered. I have no idea what to expect in terms of the other two boys' reactions. And I still haven't been able to decide whether to observe, or not. Guess I will only know what I'll do when I have done it.

In human terms, what I've observed over the past few weeks has appeared really rather sweet. When Cody has been resting (on a big old pile of hay know as the horsebed) this past week or so, both Paint and Rio have mostly just stood quietly by him, or laid down hear him. They seem to be watching over him. Or so I'd like to think, anyhow...

Thanks for being here.

Kathy
}
Member:
shirl

Posted on Sunday, Nov 22, 2009 - 11:34 pm:

Dear Kathy,
In my mind and heart I suspect Rio and Paint know that Cody is near ready to say good-bye. Your decision is a wise one but that's just my opinion.
When my former horse was boarded with another mare she was very close to (there was just the two of them) the owner's horse had to be put down. My horse was allowed to watch from a decent distance but she could see it all so she understood her friend was gone. She stood quietly but of course missed her terribly and became depressed being the only horse there. Shortly after she was moved to another barn where she had company. Since you have two other horses I'm sure they will adjust after a time.
Many thoughts are with you at this sad time.

Shirley
Member:
mrose

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 12:26 am:

I'm so sorry, Kathy. As you probably know, I lost my 28 yr. old mare, Beau, a week ago. I know what you are dealing with. I was prepared to put Beau down for the same reason; I didn't want her to suffer, but she saved me making that decission and died quietly in her sleep. A wonderful gift; I've never had it happen before. You are doing what is best for your guy. Hugs and best wishes. It is never easy no matter what the conditions.
Member:
scooter

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 6:47 am:

Kathy my thoughts are with you on this difficult day, it is never an easy choice to make. You are a wise horsewoman to not let Cody suffer, and think ahead about the Holidays and you not being around in case he got very ill.

My condolences to you
Member:
canter

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 7:14 am:

Kathy, I'm sorry that you must make such a difficult decision, but am very glad you have the courage to make it and do right by Cody.

My thoughts are with you~
Fran
Member:
ajudson1

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 7:26 am:

Kathy,

It's a hard choice to make always. I admire that you notice the other horses are also getting ready to say good bye. I've seen that happen twice in my own little herd. They sense what we sometimes don't want to admit, or are having a hard time deciding.

Hugs & prayers from me to you.

Angie
Moderator:
DrO

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 8:15 am:

My condolences Kathy. I know this is a very difficult decision.
DrO
Member:
lilo

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 9:58 am:

Kathy,

What a tough decision, but, I think, a wise one. Both times we had to put horses down, I did not stay to watch. My daughter and I stayed inside and cried, and cried ....

My husband did the tough duty, staying outside with the Vet.

My mare was very attached to both those herd mates. When the first one was put down, she was in the pasture and got very agitated and ran around and whinnied. But, she seemed to understand. She had to spend some time alone before we found another companion for her, but she did adjust to being the only horse (she could see other horses in the distance). I think it is good that you have two horses.

My sincere condolences,
Lilo
Member:
vickiann

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 11:16 am:

Such a hard decision, but you know your horse best, Kathy.

My heart goes out to you at this difficult time.
Member:
stek

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 11:48 am:

Will be thinking of you today and sending you strength. Hang in there.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 12:16 pm:

Thank you one and all for your kind thoughts and words, you don't know how much they mean...on second thought, though, probably you all do...

I am leaning towards being present, just based on what I know about myself. One of my overriding passions in life is to know and understand what goes on around me, and truthfully I can't quite picture myself going inside and letting it happen without me. What I conjure up in my imagination may be worse that the reality.

I have often wished many times during the past 6 weeks, that Cody would do as Beau did, Sara, and quietly take this burden off my shoulders. But as my farrier said (with admiration) when he first met Cody, he's a stubborn old coot! I have come to respect that quality in him, even if it has made it hard to love him they way I love the others.

I will let you know how it goes when it is all over and I can write about it.

My deepest gratitude for your sympathies,

Kathy
Member:
kpaint

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 1:52 pm:

I'd want to be there to see an old friend leave. Thinking of you today Kathy.
Member:
sodmonst

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 2:01 pm:

I am sorry for you, Kathy, and believe that you are giving Cody a gift by helping him go this way. I have been with a friend's horse when he was put down, which worked out for all of us. Actually several of us have done this for each other.

It's a difficult process for me to witness, but I can report back to the owner that the horse was euthanized respectfully and without fear or suffering, and the owner is spared from carrying that sad image as a last memory.
Member:
frances

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 3:33 pm:

I hope that Cody passes on painlessly and peacefully, and that his passing is not traumatic for him, you or the other horses. You have worked really hard to minimise the physical and emotional suffering for your horses - I hope that you too are spared the pain.
Member:
dustee

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 3:59 pm:

My last horse, Dallas, and I were so bonded, and I had to be there when the vet put him down. I am fine with the results of this, because I told him how much he meant to me, and rubbed his face - and he was gone. He never suffered for one second, and that meant the world to me. I am ok with this since, knowing I made the right decision, and have not been haunted in any way by that decision. I wish you the best through this.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 6:27 pm:

Cody's story came to a relatively peaceful end around noontime today. For a horse that the farrier (in admiration) called a "stubborn old coot", Cody must have been ready to go, because it was all over within a minute or two. I did chose to be there, although I don't know that it would have made a difference to him either way.

The vet gave him the pre-tranquilizer, and he became a little wobbly almost immediately. Then the vet administered the 2 syringes of whatever-it-is, and Cody kind of sat on his hind end, rolled over on his side, and was gone.

Since the vet thought it was a good idea, I let the other two boys out of the pens so they could see what had happened to Cody. Around an hour later, the disposal people arrived-- that was the only part I didn't want to see.

Rio is pretty overtly upset, running around periodically and calling out for his buddy, Paint less apparently so. Since Paint is probably 3 times Rio's age, I imagine that he has seen death before. Plus, Cody let Rio a lot closer to him than he ever let Paint get; maybe because he had so much less energy than he used to, who knows? If I had to do it again, I would have postponed the removal of the body a bit, so that the other horses could have more time to adjust. I don't think Rio quite comprehends.

My epitaph for Cody is that he was, in fact, a stubborn old coot. He never seemed to like us humans very much, and probably he had his reasons. Because of him, I had to learn a lot of things about horses that I might not otherwise have learned, or not so soon. And he was a great herd boss, exerting his authority with a minimum of force. I am hoping in their short acquaintance, he was able to teach Rio, the next boss, some of what he knew.

All of you, your advice and support has really helped me survive the past 6 weeks, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Kathy
Member:
erika

Posted on Monday, Nov 23, 2009 - 7:05 pm:

Well, Kathy, sorry for your sad day. Cody got a good six weeks of good life extra didn't he? As well as a chance to make one last new friend. I'm glad he went peacefully.
Erika
Member:
npo33901

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 10:12 am:

My condolences. Hope you two other horses will ease your pain a little .
Member:
klowe

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 11:25 am:

I just thought you all might like to see Cody, in better days...Cody, Xmas 2007
Member:
frances

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 12:27 pm:

He looks sweet but, yes, full of "character" - you can see he's working on a plan there. I like his white stripe with a star at the top and a sharp turn at the bottom. Actually I like him altogether. So glad that his exit was gentle and easy. Well done you.
Member:
stek

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 1:22 pm:

What a cutie! Thanks for sharing Kathy.
New Member:
djrn55

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 2:15 pm:

my heart goes out to you Kathy.I've been following this post for quite some time and the tears just flow each time. the fact that you gave a horse that was "an old cout",a good home and love the only way he allowed you,says how good of a person you are.so many people just keep passing that kind of horse on.
may God bless you with your new horse and may you all be best of friends. on another note,if you can find a Parelli group near you,you can do wonderful things with your horses in a way that will make an unbelievable relationship!
Hugs and Prayers,Debbie}}
Member:
klowe

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 2:36 pm:

Yeah, he did have a kind of sweet & gentle look about him sometimes, although it never really manifested in his behavior! I was really surprised how close he let me get that day with the camera. Usually he would move further away long before you got that close. I most always believed that there was some sweetness & gentleness in him, though, I just thought there would be more time to find it.
Member:
shogeboo

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 3:42 pm:

I am sorry for your loss, Kathy. Cody taught you lots of lessons, even if he wasn't your perfect horse. He was lucky to have you, and you to have him. He really was very adorable. My condolences to you in your loss.
Member:
mrose

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 4:01 pm:

Thanks for posting his picture. I love horses with "character!" He has lots of good company where he is now. I know a couple of mares in particular that might enjoy trying to boss him around a little.
Member:
zarr

Posted on Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009 - 4:14 pm:

Cody sounds like the grumpy old man who doesn't seem to really need others but does so much! It is good that you were in his life even at the end. The lessons Cody taught you were his Thank Yous for putting up with him til the end!
Member:
jowidner

Posted on Saturday, Nov 28, 2009 - 12:20 am:

I'm so sorry Kathy. Cody found a good friend in you. He does look like he was his own horse and I love his face! Sending tender thoughts your way. May your spirit run free Cody!

Jo Ann
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