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  Discussion on Saying Goodbye, letting go
Author Message
Member:
halln5

Posted on Tuesday, Mar 22, 2011 - 4:20 pm:

I read another post re: when to know it's time to say goodbye to an old equine friend. I am thinking of this topic a lot lately, since I have a now 36 year old gelding that I have owned for 28 years. He was by himself off and on for a number of years, but last September, I brought home a 2 year old American Drum horse and they quickly bonded. Now, Playboy, my old guy, is showing signs of his age. He has cheated death at least several other times in the past 5 years (twice from colic and once when I found him down in the paddock in -30 degree wind/ice/snowstorm and I had to call neighbors to come and help get him up). My vet can't believe that he is still with us.
He was down again yesterday morning--halfway in his stall, halfway out of it in the paddock area. My husband and I were able to pull him around and then help him get up. Afterwards, he ate, peed, pooped and acted just fine.
BUT, this incident has gotten me thinking again about when I need to think about putting him down. He is not in any obvious pain, other than stiffness from arthritis, he has very few teeth in the back and so is on a soft diet, but I have noticed that he seems a little more feeble and wobbly lately. The young one isn't always polite and tends to barge past him.
So, I don't know if I really have a question, other than when will I know the right time? It seems like all I can think about lately--he has been such a good friend, has taught my kids to ride and is so good natured. He loved a good long trail ride and was such fun. It just makes me so sad to think of him not being there in my backyard. I guess I just had to dump on you guys. Thanks for listening.
Member:
jolie

Posted on Tuesday, Mar 22, 2011 - 4:39 pm:

Vickie...
Been there. You have to make the decision that you can live with. If he is anything like my guy he has such a big heart you probably don't know what kind of pain he is really in. It has been a year and a half since I made this decision. I still go out and sit on his grave and cry as I miss him so much. He was my best friend.

All my best to you all...
Jolie
Member:
lilo

Posted on Tuesday, Mar 22, 2011 - 5:37 pm:

Dear Vickie - It is so very hard to make this final decision and let go of a very dear friend. Most people say you will know when it is the right time. 36 is certainly a ripe old age. But, if he is eating, drinking and getting around alright ...

I can't really help, it is a very personal decision. I feel for you,
Lilo
Member:
ajudson1

Posted on Tuesday, Mar 22, 2011 - 6:34 pm:

When I first got horses in my 2nd marriage, we all said that Fancy, a small, gentle Arab mare, would be with us until she died from old age. She taught my husband, and our 4 kids, how to ride. She was the sweetest and smartest horse I ever had the privileged of knowing, much less owning.

My mentor told me once that you had to separate the barn from the house...ugh...I always hated that statement and tried to forget it. Like saying separate your head from your heart!

Fancy's knee broke down on her at a young age I think she was 12 when she started showing signs of pain. We made the decision to end her time with us 3 years later. Her last winter with us I noticed the other horses driving her to her knees repeatedly, and it just broke my heart. Stall rest was never an option with her, her only negative point that I ever noticed was she hated being cooped up and would injure herself more in the stall than outside.

My youngest daughter & I spent hours grooming her and took pictures on her last day with us. We had a lovely fare well party. Her pictures hang near our dining room table, the only pictures of horses I have on walls!

I still cried & cried. I couldn't go with when she was euthanized beside her grave. I sat on her stall wall until I heard the dozer leave, and my husband and vet came back in the barn. Both had wet eyes.

Yes, you will know when it's the right time, when you see his quality of life is not as good as it should be. Say your good-byes in a way that is special to you. Save a lock of mane, or tail...make a shadow box showcasing that with his bridle, or something to occupy yourself in the days that you will miss him. You are getting close to making that final decision just by talking to us about it.

(((hugs)))
Member:
vickiann

Posted on Tuesday, Mar 22, 2011 - 8:15 pm:

I had to make this decision not long ago for our Australian Shepherd who had cancer.

I could see that she was suddenly struggling a couple of days in a row to continue with her normal routines such as going with me to the barn to do our chores.

On her last day she laid down on the dining room floor and had ceased following me around constantly.

It was just too hard for her to get up and down and I could see that she would not be up to doing her normal routine activities. Her breathing became labored.

I sat with her and brushed and petted her until my farm Vet arrived.

She would make the effort now and then to raise her head and smile at me but I could see that this took a true effort on her part and she was doing it more for me than for her.

She was quietly euthanized right there in one of her favorite spots.

It was hard to let her go but it was the right thing and a gift that I could give to her of mercy before real suffering set in.

I have heard stories from other friends about how other horses sometimes begin to be hard on a herd member who is infirm or failing and it is not good when that happens. The others don't do it out of meanness but as part of their quest for survival?

I agree with the others. You will know when the time is right. Our animals seem to tell us when it is time.
Member:
halln5

Posted on Tuesday, Mar 22, 2011 - 9:15 pm:

Thank you so much, all of you. It does help to talk about it with others who have gone through the same thing. Part of my struggle is that I don't have enough land (and the water table is so low) to be able to bury him on my land. I will have to call the "truck" to get him. That will be so hard--such an indignity for such a noble creature.
Last year, I took some of his tail hair and took it to a lady in St. Louis who makes pottery using the mane or tail hair of horses in the design. So, I made a pot with Playboy's hair and then braided some to go around the neck of the pot. It will always hold a place of honor in my house.

He may not be quite ready yet--I just see some signs that make me wonder.
Thank you for your kind comments.
Vicki
Member:
canter

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 7:18 am:

Vicki, I am truly sorry that you are faced with this difficult decision. I think sometimes, the decision itself is actually harder than following the path the decision leads to. But once the decision is made, I think you will find a sense of relief in knowing you are doing the right thing. It doesn't lesson the pain of losing your beloved horse, but it provides a small measure of comfort.

I too hate the thought of "the truck" and all it's ugly implications. Have you thought of having Playboy cremated? Is there a pet cemetary near you? Perhaps one of those options is more comfortable for you.

Best wishes.
Member:
ajudson1

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 7:31 am:

Vicki, I'd love to see the pottery if you'd care to share, what a wonderful idea!

I can understand the part about having to call the "truck" to get him. We are fortunate to have our own pet cemetery. Is there any other option?

How are his eyes? Still alert and full of life? One thing I noticed with Fancy was her eyes had lost their sparkle. It's really noticeable in the 3 pictures I have up; her decline shows in her eyes and overall. These noble creatures hide their pain from us very well.

"I have heard stories from other friends about how other horses sometimes begin to be hard on a herd member who is infirm or failing and it is not good when that happens. The others don't do it out of meanness but as part of their quest for survival?"

I saw that happen. Fancy was a dignified leader...a Queen who ruled with the knowledge she was born to be Queen! We had 4-6 horses over the years we had her, and she would do nothing more than flatten her ears most times to make her point. Only a youngster foolish enough to keep pestering her got more than "the ear, the look" lol!

Her last winter with us, it was the 2 youngsters that were lowest in the pecking order who were the meanest to her. It was as if they knew with her gone they'd move up the ladder. Which they did, but Tango was still on the bottom rung! I guess being number 4 was better than number 5.

Obviously my other mare become the Queen. She's not the same kind of leader though.

'Nways, Vicki, I'd be concerned about your younger one barging past the old man. I'd be concerned that something happens in a very inconvenient spot if you know what I mean.
Member:
lhenning

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 9:54 am:

Hi Vicki,

I have experienced making this decision with my husband's mother. She was on a ventilator, 80 years old, and the doctor had exhausted all options. His sister, his father, and my husband were so close to her, but I was new to the family and had a little different point of view. Yet, the whole event hit me quite hard. I spent months afterwards trying to make sense of it. What I walked away with is that at the time of making that decision, all the family was thinking about was their mother. Her comfort, her dignity, her belief in a life beyond the earthly life. So they made that tough choice. However, after that they had such guilt and said to me on several occasions that they wished they had not done it and just let her go on her own. So every day after they thought of themselves, in the sense that they missed their mom and wanted her back like she used to be. From my point of view I knew this was not an option and I told them so.

When your horse's time is near you will know because her condition will tell you so. Then you will think only of her and her comfort, make your decision, and you will make the right decision. Every day after you will think of how it affects you and that is the grieving we must all endure when someone we love passes.

Death is a part of life and we all have our day. Maybe I am turning something so emotional into something analytical but that is how I think. However, it did help my husbands family to think of it this way. In other words, they really would have made the same decision a hundred times over, because they did so out of love. What a wonderful gift to give to someone we care about. Would you not want others that love you to do the same for you?

Peace be with you. We are here to help you through this.
Member:
halln5

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 11:28 am:

Here is a picture of the pot I made at Earth & Wheel. There are all different sizes you can check out at www.earthandwheel.com . It is a wonderful way to have a keepsake of a much loved horse.
I took a critical look at Playboy this morning. His eyes don't look dull,but he is sooo thin and feeble. I figure that when he stops being interested in his food, that will be a good sign. He's just such a good old boy. Called "Playboy" because he used to forget he was a gelding and have his way with the mares where I boarded. He is very bonded to my new one, calls to him and trots (stiffly) around the paddock if left behind. Sigh. . .
Picture of pot--The squiggles are tail hair burned onto pot as it comes out of kiln.
Member:
mrose

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 11:34 am:

Hi Vickie. I've had to deal with this issue many times, and it never gets any easier. I always feel that if you know the animal, you will be able to tell the time. With me, it is a quality of life issue also. If the eyes are bright, you are able to keep any pain at a low level, the horse is eating, drinking, and releaving itself normally, then I feel it's not yet time. You can't base a decission on age. Some horses are ready in their teens, and I've known some great old horses, still pretty perky, in their early 40's. An old Arab mare belonging to a friend of mine was still giving small grand children rides at the age of 46! She was sway backed and had periodic bouts of founder, but on her good days wandered all over the neighborhood happy as could be. Finally, it was the laminitis that did her in. When she became chronic and could no longer be kept pain free, her owners had her euthanized.

In my experience, when the horse begins to look "dull" and withdraws, when the light starts to leave their eyes, it's time.

It seems to me, however, that you face some issues keeping your old guy happy and healthy given his pasture/barn mates. Can you separate him with a portable corral for feeding time? Or divide the pasture in half with electric wire? Old horses eat more slowly than their younger friends, and often due to a fear of getting hurt, they aren't aggressive and sink to the bottom of the totem pole in rank. Due to this, they don't get enough feed. Also, I've had wonderful luck with old horses feeding soaked beet pulp, rice bran and senior feed. Our neighbor's old girl, age 38, is looking pretty good on this diet and I don't think she has any teeth at all in the back. Old horses need to be kept up on their shots and usually need to be wormed more frequently than the younger ones also.

I'm sure you'll figure out what is right for your old guy. Only you (and he) can really answer your question.
Member:
halln5

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 11:51 am:

Sara, just to clarify--I do separate the 2 for feeding. I just have a 2 stall barn with a paddock and small pasture (which is currently very muddy and unusable). So, the horses go into their stalls for feeding and Playboy gets as much time as he needs to eat. He gets a senior feed and beet pulp, plus wads a little hay around in his toothless mouth, spitting out the quids for the other one to eat. He just had his shots and teeth checked and I do worm regularly.
Thanks for the comments, all and the good wishes.
Member:
mrose

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 12:09 pm:

I missed that, Vickie. I kind of skim sometimes.

LOVE the pot! I've seen this type of pot before in gift shops. Great idea to do one!

btw, you maybe should add a little rice bran to the beet pulp. If I remember correctly, you need the bran to balance calcium phosperous levels. Might want to check on that; it might be only if feeding the pulp with alfalfa hay.
Member:
halln5

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 12:20 pm:

I will check on the rice bran. Do they carry that in regular feed stores? How is it fed? How much, etc. I only feed grass hay though.
The pot IS neat. A friend and I were able to go to this lady's house where we actually made the pots ourselves. It was fun. You can also just send her the hair and she will make the pot and send it to you.
Member:
ajudson1

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 12:36 pm:

That is beyond neat! I still have Fancy's hair from our last grooming session when we trimmed her bridle path. I will check the link out.

Thanks
Member:
mrose

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 12:48 pm:

I wish I'd known about the pot when Beau died. No one thought of saving anything and I didn't have the presence of mind to do anything either.

The rice bran is in most feed stores. I just get regular rice bran,not the fancy stuff. The amount you feed depends on the amount of hay. There's info on it on HA if you search. I feed half a cup twice a day to my older mares. My vet says you can feed up to a couple of cups a day. It really helps keep/put weight on also and gives shine to their coats.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 1:30 pm:

Hi, Vickie- You have my sympathies, Playboy is lucky to have you. I had a thread about this around 18 months ago, "Letting one go, finding the next," if you haven't seen it. All the folks at HA were really wonderful, supportive and gave me great advice. I agonized over Cody, who had some form of cancer; I'd only had him a few years, and actually I didn't really like him all that much, nor did he like anyone. But I guess I loved him, sort of, and the whole thing was awful and very painful. I can't even imagine what it must be like when the animal in question has been with you so long, and is so loved.

I think was carried me through was my belief that, if you are a person with an animal family, it is your job to ensure that they are not suffering unnecessarily. I was terrified that I wouldn't be able to tell when it was time for Cody, he was a very stoic, unemotive horse. I wanted to let him live as long as possible, but not too long... He never stopped eating, although he apparently stopped being able to utilize much of what he ate (he ate & pooped constantly), and he remained the herd leader until the end. For which I was profoundly grateful. The others didn't seem to care what he did or didn't do, they followed his lead.

In the last week of his life, I could see that he was winding down rapidly. He started spending a great deal of time lying down, with the other two boys standing quietly nearby. And I knew it was time, because the only possible outcome was that something would happen when I wasn't there to deal with it, or that something really acute would happen and he would truly be suffering.

I chose to be there, because I saw that, also, as a part of my responsibility to him. As the vet said, he might not have loved me, but I was part of his herd and thus reassuring to him. But that's a really individual choice, though, I think. Too many people told me too emphatically that I wouldn't want to be there, which made me doubt my own sense that yeah, I really did. And I was glad I was there, it was very quick and quiet, and made me surer than ever that the timing had been right.

I too live in a place where the water table is really close to the surface, and I was unable to bury him. Having to call the renderer was the worst, but it was really all I could do. And after all, he wasn't there anymore...it was painful for me, but it didn't hurt him in the least.

So from that long-winded story, the essence is: trust your own instincts. And know that HAer are here, and understand entirely what you are feeling.

Kathy
Member:
vickiann

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 4:29 pm:

What a lot of wonderful advice and insightful comments.

The pot is gorgeous, Vicki.

A dear friend of mine had to euthanize her much-loved Icelandic horse last fall and she was there while it was done but then took her Mother out and away from the property while her husband waited for the renderer.

They coordinated the pick up with the euthanasia so that the horse would not have to lie there any amount of time.

A little planning ahead can make things easier.

When my sister died of cancer some of us elected to watch the process of her being placed into the body bag and removed from the house but I think that can be and was done in a more dignified way than when a horse or cow is hauled into the back of a truck. That is something that I would probably decide to pass on if I could.

One thing that I have learned in life is that there are things worse than death.

Hopefully Playboy will still have some good years left in him.

Good luck with getting some weight back on him while the weather improves. The rice bran oil is a good idea and some people like Cocosoya for weight gain as the horses reportedly seem to love it.
Member:
vickiann

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 4:39 pm:

Here is a link about the CocoSoya.

They offer a free sample.

https://www.uckeleequine.com/page/freesample/
Member:
jowidner

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 23, 2011 - 5:18 pm:

Vicki, my heart goes out to you and Playboy. This is something that so many of us with old horses or sick horses must face. There are many excellent points made here. When my older horse began to be pushed around by the younger horses, we made her her own paddock and that helped a great deal. She could still be with the other horses but they couldn't get to her and push her around. It made a huge difference in her comfort and attitude.

Do what you can to keep him comfortable and happy, and keep a close eye on him. Sara has given you some excellent guidelines. When the time comes, you'll know that you gave him your very best and your love, and that's all any horse could ever ask for.

The pot is beautiful and a wonderful idea. I especially love the braid of horsehair around the neck of the pot. What a wonderful keepsake.

Best wishes,

Jo Ann
Member:
halln5

Posted on Thursday, Mar 24, 2011 - 9:35 am:

I have read every one of your posts with such gratitude for the depth of feeling and the wealth of advice from people I don't even know but have this common bond with. Thank you! The last couple of days (since the last time he was down halfway in and halfway out of his stall), Playboy has not cleaned up his beet pulp. I've noticed him standing so that his back end is supported by a wall or post. I think decision time is here and I must make it. Will call my vet today and talk to him about the whole thing. It's difficult to imagine him NOT in my backyard.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Thursday, Mar 24, 2011 - 12:10 pm:

I am sorry to hear it, Vicki, but I know you will do what's right for Playboy because you love him. I just had that kind of scare with my most beloved dog ever, age 13, peeing blood. Spent a bunch of money I didn't really have on x-ray, ultrasound, to still have no firm diagnosis. Said no to exploratory surgery & chose to treat it as a possible long-term infection with 6 weeks of antibiotics. Looks like it maybe worked, knock on wood.

But it made me revisit all these issues, which I know are heartbreaking. And yet, and yet...I would never chose not to have animals in my life, even knowing how agonizing the endings are. Not ever!

Take care of yourself too.

Kathy
Member:
vickiann

Posted on Thursday, Mar 24, 2011 - 5:37 pm:

Vicki LH:

Will be thinking of you and Playboy who seems to be such a grand horse.

How blessed we are to have these sweet friends as part of our lives.

And they are blessed for our love and care and sometimes those decisions to do what is best for them are hard ones.
Member:
theresab

Posted on Thursday, Mar 24, 2011 - 9:41 pm:

Vicki LH:

Making that decision is horribly difficult. When my 32 y/o Arab coliced the worst part was waiting for the vet. If I could have put him out of his misery myself I would have. I spent the time waiting trying to walk him, groom him and talking to him. I promised myself that he took way to good care of me to have him suffer. He was with me for almost 20 years and moved with me to 4 states.

I was boarding him at the time and didn't have access to bury him. I found a cremation service in the area and was able to bring him home finally. It's expensive but this way he'll always be with me. I was able to send a picture and write a nice poem that I had engraved on his wooden box. They did a wonderful job and were very professional. I've had both horses I've lost cremated and their ashes sent to me.

I can understand your pain, but when you look into their eyes you know you made the right decision.
Member:
halln5

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 12:11 pm:

Well, it looks like the time has come. Playboy was down this morning again. We were able to get him up and I set about making the arrangements. Now,we are holding vigil in the barn and waiting for the vet.
I looked in cremation but I just cannot afford that route, so the truck comes around 1 today.
Thank you again or all the support. You have all helped me so much.
Member:
kpaint

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 12:23 pm:

Sorry to hear the time has come Vicki LH. Sounds as if Playboy had a long life. 36 years for a horse is a pretty good ride on this planet. (hugs)
Member:
mrose

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 12:31 pm:

I'm sorry, Vickie. I hope you find peace knowing you've done all you could including making this difficult decission. Is someone around that can attend to the truck when it comes? It would be a great help to you to have someone else take care of that detail. If not, keep reminding yourself that his spirit has moved on and that his body is just an empty shell. Playboy will have moved on to "greener pastures."

You are giving Playboy the final gift of love and kindness. God Bless.
Member:
klowe

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 12:36 pm:

I am very sorry that you are going through this, Vicki. Hugs and sympathy.
Member:
hpyhaulr

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 12:50 pm:

the final act of friendship.
So sorry you have to do this. How admirable that you have the courage to do the best you can for your dear friend. hugs.
Member:
canter

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 1:00 pm:

I'm truly sorry, Vicki. My sympathies to you~
Fran
Member:
shirl

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 1:22 pm:

Sara is right, his spirit will move on to a better place and he'll be happy there, out of pain and free.

My sympathy to you. Cherish memories of him.

Hugs, Shirl
Member:
theresab

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 1:41 pm:

My sympathies to you, I'm very sorry you have to make that decision but glad you have the strength to make it.

Theresa
Member:
halln5

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 3:34 pm:

My wonderful vet, who answered my call on his day off, arrived about 1 today. So, Playboy is in greener pastures and although I will miss him terribly I know this was the right thing to do. It was kind of a blessing that it happened today. My husband was off work, my daughter was off work, I just called in and talked to my principal and told him I was staying home today. He was understanding. The truck is in this area today and while it hasn't come yet, I still am grateful that things have run fairly smoothly.
The 3 of us spent all morning in the barn, chatting, watching Playboy, grooming him, talking to him, remembering the time my then 3 year old daughter ran between Playboy's legs and how upset I was with her. The money to purchase him was a gift from my mother, sisters and brother, who gave me an "unbirthday" party in 1983 and presented me with a check for $800.00. I promptly went on a horse search and found 8 year old Playboy--I got him AND a Circle Y show saddle and delivery for $750.00. A pretty good deal for a horse who taught 3 kids to ride, went on numerous trail rides and did a few local shows. When I was first dating my husband, we would meet for lunch at the boarding stable and share our burgers and fries with Playboy. He loved anything food. I could go on--May he rest in peace and gallop freely across heaven's meadows.
We took a few pictures--I will try to put one up in a while.
Thank you all again for your kindnesses.
Member:
mrose

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 4:18 pm:

You were blessed to have such a wonderful horse in your life. Guys like him are priceless. I look forward to a picture or two.
Member:
jowidner

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 6:21 pm:

So sorry for your loss Vicki. Playboy certainly was a special boy and I know you and your family will remember him always. ((((Vicki and family))))
Member:
lilo

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 6:26 pm:

Playboy sounds like he was a very special member of your family. Reminds me of my daughter's horse, who was put down because of cancer at age 16 - we still miss him! Rest in Peace, Playboy.

My condolences,
Lilo
Member:
vickiann

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 8:39 pm:

My heart aches for you knowing the depths of your loss, Vicki.

Wishing you happy memories of playboy who so touched your lives.
Member:
halln5

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 9:04 pm:

Here is a picture we took this morning or myself and Playboy. He had such a happy expression.
Member:
rtrotter

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 9:38 pm:

What a lovely goodbye picture! It will help you remember the good times. I am so sorry for your loss, he was a very pretty boy.

Godspeed Playboy and God Bless you for doing the right thing.

Rachelle
Member:
kpaint

Posted on Friday, Mar 25, 2011 - 10:36 pm:

Happy Expression, Happy Life.
Member:
mrose

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 12:59 am:

Oh, I love that picture! What a sweet looking guy. I know well how much you will miss him, as do many others on this board. Time does make it better. But there are times when I miss some animals I've had that have been gone for many years. EAch is so special in it's own way. Great idea to take the picture. It's lovely.
Member:
frances

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 1:05 am:

He looks lovely, Vicki. I'm so sorry you've had to lose your friend, but it must be a comfort knowing you've done the best for him right up to the end.
Member:
lhenning

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 9:55 am:

(((big hug)))
Member:
klowe

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 10:16 am:

You guys look like a couple of ol' buddies, hanging out together. How wonderful!
Member:
ajudson1

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 10:35 am:

Very Sweeeet looking picture! Rest assured he will be welcomed over that Rainbow Bridge by all of our wonderful 4 hoofed friends who have went before him. Picture him running on the greenest of green pastures, blue skies above, rainbows in the distance.

RIP Playboy Hugs Vicki
Member:
halln5

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 9:22 pm:

Thanks all. So, now I have my 3 year old Drum Horse in the backyard by himself. He is pretty calm and quiet although I know he looks for Playboy every time I open the barn door. I am thinking that I may need to go ahead and move him to the boarding barn where I have my other horse so we can start working him. THEN, I will have no horses in my backyard!
I guess this needs to be the end of this thread. Thank you all so much for helping me through this difficult time. You are the best. Vicki
Member:
lilo

Posted on Saturday, Mar 26, 2011 - 9:48 pm:

Thanks for posting the picture of you and Playboy. What a kind look he has.
All the best for the future,
Lilo
Member:
quatro

Posted on Sunday, Mar 27, 2011 - 6:41 pm:

My heart goes out to you Vicki, as I am in the same boat with Dusty. Who is a very old, skinny boy, whose body is giving out, but his spirit is still hanging in there.
I am so close to having to make this decision, so it was good of you to share, and also knowing how supportive HA members are, make it so much better, not being alone when facing such a sad time.
suz
Member:
judyhens

Posted on Sunday, Mar 27, 2011 - 7:06 pm:

Vicki, you are in our thoughts and prayers. Clearly Playboy had a wonderful home. What a positive impact he had on your family's life!
Blessings,
Judy
Member:
halln5

Posted on Sunday, Mar 27, 2011 - 9:19 pm:

Susan, I am sorry you are also facing this decision. It is sad to see a once really energetic friend go downhill. My husband and I had decided that when Playboy couldn't get himself up, it would be time. He had a kind eye and loving spirit up to the end. And yes, HA members have been nothing but supportive. I trust you have read over these posts. I am so grateful to have had this outlet. My family and friends all understand this loss and are supportive as well. Every one has a "Playboy story". He was such a dear part of our family.
But, like all these others have said, your Dusty has had a good life and is with a good owner. You will know the right decision when the time comes. Vicki
Member:
zarr

Posted on Sunday, Mar 27, 2011 - 9:24 pm:

Vicki a friend lost a beautiful white mare named Tessa It would seem Playboy will stroll across the Bridge with a friend!

God looked around his garden,
And found an empty place.
He then looked down upon the earth,
And saw your tired face.
He put his arms around you,
And lifted you to rest;
God's garden must be beautiful-He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering,
He knew you were in pain;
He knew you would never get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough
And hills were hard to climb
So he closed your weary eyelids, and whispered,
"Peace be thine."
It broke our hearts to lose you,
But you didn't go alone,
For a part of us went with you,
The day God called you home.
Member:
gwenyth

Posted on Monday, Mar 28, 2011 - 10:54 am:

Vicki, I came across this discussion today and when I saw the reference to the Drum Horse with the name VickiLH, I realized that it was YOU! (I'm Nancy from LEDA) And of course your picture confirmed it for me.

I am so terribly sorry for your loss, and unfortunately I am also experiencing the same pain, as one of our dogs died suddenly on Saturday morning. Gosh, we love them so much and then they have to leave us....

It sounds as if Playboy had a great life with you and I really admire you for not waiting too long, and for being there with him. What you did was so kind and so gracious, there is a special place in heaven for you!

The pain of their loss never leaves us, but knowing that they are again eating young spring grass and running with newly young legs helps us to handle the grief of their passing.

Take care,

Nancy
Member:
cometrdr

Posted on Monday, Mar 28, 2011 - 2:44 pm:

yes I agree with everyone - just hearing this make me wanna cry with sorry for your loss but rejoice in the happiness that you Playboy is now feeling
bless you
you did the right thing
Member:
klowe

Posted on Monday, Mar 28, 2011 - 3:16 pm:

I kinda fall on the agnostic side of the fence; I consider myself spiritual but not religious...I don't know for sure what lies beyond.

But what I do know is that you were with Playboy for almost all his life, you spent his last day with him, and you made sure he exited without suffering too much pain or indignity. I hope there's another place, for me and mine, and you and yours, all of you. But whether there is or not, what you and your family gave Playboy, and what he gave you speaks for itself, and is a kind of monument, I think.
Member:
jowidner

Posted on Monday, Mar 28, 2011 - 9:44 pm:

Aw, Vicki, that's such a sweet picture. Big, big hugs to you!
Member:
paul303

Posted on Wednesday, Mar 30, 2011 - 9:00 pm:

They do so much for us...don't they?
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