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  Discussion on My horse died and we still don't know why....
Author Message
Member:
julieh

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 3:46 pm:

This horrible nightmare started last Monday. Our yearling Little Mac started acting different last Monday. He just acted like he didn't feel well and I assumed it was the heat since it was in the 90's and very humid. By Tuesday, he still wasn't better but now he wasn't eating, so I knew it wasn't the heat. I called our normal vet and he was unavailable until Thursday so we took him to our trainer's vet an hour away. When we got there, he seemed to perk up a bit but I am sure it was because the other horses there were talking to him. Tuesday night, the vet called me to let me know Mac had a high fever but he had it down with medication but they still didn't know the problem. Wednesday morning he called to let me know they thought it was a viral thing and they were giving him antibiotics and bantimine but we could pick him up Friday morning. Thursday morning he called me back and said he was worse; his protein level would not even register it was so low but his other blood work was fine. He seemed to be in some pain but he didn't know if it was gastric or in his chest. By Thursday night, they had taken him off everything and given him an IV and plasma. His white blood cell count had tripled in four hours and he was rolling in pain and they were having to keep him sedated and keep someone in his stall just about all the time. They asked me tons of questions about pesticide runoff, drinking out of ponds, could someone have fed him over the fence, etc. Nothing led up to poisoning of any kind. He had horrible diarrhea and by that time they knew it was gastric. By Friday morning, his feces had blood in it and by Friday at noon, it was all blood. It was decided he needed to be put down because of his suffering. When they were about to euthanize him, he had white foam coming out of his nose. We are heartbroken because we lost Little Mac. It is so frustrating not to know why. We have three other horses in that pasture. They are all fine; we have searched the pasture for anything that could have caused this. I guess I am hoping someone can give me some ideas as to what could have caused this? Our trainer says it sounds like he was poisoned, but I don't know how. We asked about a necropsy but the vet said all they would be able to tell was that something really tore his gut up. If anyone has any ideas, I would be so appreciative.
Member:
scooter

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 4:35 pm:

How awful Julie, my condolences. I don't have much to offer other than the diharrea sounds like salomenella of possibly potomac horse fever, colitis x or many things. You probably will never know for sure. You did everything you could and I know from experience the questions left in our minds are troublesome. Unfortunately there are just some things we can't "fix". I'm not sure, but I don't think poisoning would cause a high fever, but Dr.O can answer that question way better than I. Godspeed to Little Mac.
New Member:
windmtn

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 4:50 pm:

Dear Julie,
First, I'm so sorry about the death of your youngster. What a sad thing to happen to a young and sweet horse. I do know what you are going through.
Maybe this will give you some peace.
3 years ago my 3 year old Lipizzan mare, Isabeau, got sick. I have 16 horses. No one else got sick. Her symptoms were: first, not wanting to eat, then fevers, then diarhea. Isabeau was one of my very best mares and I had her since 1 year old. I was frantic as I am sure you were too. My vet came out immediately. He gave medicines to clear the gut, but she only got worse. Fevers, lethargic, not wanting to eat and terrible diarhea.
After 3 days I took her to Oregon State University Vetrinarian Hospital. There they told me she had about 40% chance to live. It seems that bacteria got into her gut. How? I did every test they offered. Nothing showed anything definitive.
For two weeks my mare was on IV plasma at $1000 per day. Every day it was the same answer: We don't know if she will live. And we don't know what caused this. It happens mostly in young horses and rarely do we (the doctors) ever find out what caused it.
Meanwhile I took all my other horses off of that pasture. I looked for poisen mushrooms, poisen plants. I suspected some terrible person had poisened her - I just didn't know what to think!!! We found nothing anywhere.
Somehow we were lucky. Isabeau survived. But the bill was $15,000. I had insurance but it only covered half. The doctors told me that even with the best care many horses simply don't live. This is a very difficult illness. And one of the most expensive to cure.
In seventeen years of keeping horses I have never had such a thing happen before or since. None of my other horses got sick. After a year I began to use that pasture again with no ill effects.
It is not your fault that this happened. You did everything you could. It is one of the most scariest things to go through - and you can spend thousands of dollars and still lose your poor horse.
My heart goes out to you,
Chris
Wind Mountain Lipizzans}
Member:
ajudson1

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 5:01 pm:

Julie,

I am so sorry to hear you have suffered such a tragic loss and one that leaves more questions than answers.

Today as I was gazing at the sky and watching the clouds, I saw the form of an Arab horse, with saddle, looking at me. I immediately thought is was a sign from Fancy, and now I am betting it was her letting me know Little Mac is with her and he's not suffering any more. She was a wonderful horse, and wonderful mom, and I just know it's her job in Heaven to care for the foals who leave us to soon.

Hugs,

Angie
Member:
jowidner

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 5:34 pm:

Julie,

I'm so sorry for your loss. Years ago we lost a beautiful and talented young horse to an overwhelming infection that he contracted at a horse show. It was devastating to see this lovely horse so ill and be unable to help him despite all our efforts and the best veterinary care available at the time. Sometimes we just can't change outcomes no matter how hard we try. I hope in time your grief will lift and you will find comfort in your memories of Little Mac, and peace in knowing that you did all that you could for him.

Jo Ann
Member:
julieh

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 6:24 pm:

I think I have been in such a fog all weekend. I go from guilt to grief. I have had to make that decision twice in the past year and that is more than I want in a lifetime! I had to make that decision for my golden retriever a year ago and it tormented me the same way. I went from - did I make the decision too soon, to, did I wait too long. Poor Little Mac suffered the last few days of his life to no avail. When the vet told me his chances were so slim, I had to make the decision and it is still haunting me. It helps so much to hear all this from everyone else! In all the fog, I never thought about the fact that maybe from poisoning, there would be no fever! I think with fever comes infection? The vet did mention Potomac Horse Fever but she was asking about drinking from ponds with that. They drink from water tubs, no ponds and my husband is very anal about scrubbing water tubs out. I am not really sure what Potomac Horse Fever is but I think she said that is from drinking from ponds with snails. Dr. O, if you have any ideas, I would love to hear them. I live in Mt. Airy, NC and I am sure you know the area, it isn't too awfully far from you.
Member:
shirl

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 6:31 pm:

Julie,
My condolences in your loss. It's bad enough to lose them when you know why. To not know makes it doubly difficult.
Angie beautiful story and I believe that is exactly what you saw and why.
Hugs,
Shirl
Member:
erika

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 6:32 pm:

Julie, what an awful experience! You did the right thing for Little Mac, so try to focus on the fact that he isn't suffering anymore.
I too, thought of Potomac.
I recently read an article that it can be carried by insects, too. If there is a light over the water source sometimes it can attract bugs that fall into the water. I seem to remember that it only takes a few infected mayflies to pass it on to a horse. Is that a possibility?
I think the article was in one of the spring issues of Equus magazine. Sorry I can't remember which one.
So sorry for your loss!
Erika
Member:
erika

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 6:38 pm:

Check out this link for info on Potomac and insects. It also says that young horses are particularly vulnerable:
https://www.cvm.umn.edu/img/assets/9385/Potomac%20Horse%20Fever.pdf
Member:
canter

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 6:53 pm:

Julie, my condolances at your sad loss of Little Mac. I do hope that you find comfort in knowing that you gave him every chance while at the same time ending his suffering when there was little hope. Finding that balance is not an easy thing to do and haunts many of us when we make that decision for a beloved companion.

Wishing you peace and comfort~
Fran
Member:
corinne

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 8:16 pm:

Julie. Our thoughts and prayers are with you also. You made your decisions based on the information you were given and while it may be hard not to second guess yourself, you did the best for your boy and his spirit will live on. So sorry you are having to deal with such a loss. Happy Trails Little Mac!
Member:
zarr

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 9:40 pm:

Julie, there really are no words right now that can touch your grief. But I believe with all my heart that a heavenly herd gathers all who come across the Bridge and they race across the meadows and up the hills waiting til their loved ones come and all are together again! Cindy
Member:
hpyhaulr

Posted on Sunday, Aug 10, 2008 - 11:23 pm:

Julie,
I suspect Cindy is right, as usual. IF the right words exist,they elude us now. Give in to the grief as you must, but I will pray you will spare yourself the guilt. You did not turn your back, rush a decision, deny an opportunity, and when hope faded and courage was called for, you stepped up to the plate and did the best you could at that point. I suspect that the hurt is as real when you know why as when you don't. I am so sorry your your loss.
Peace.
Member:
paardex

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 3:49 am:

Julie I am so sorry for your loss. Don't torture yourself with questioning your decision or the timing. You did the best you could and as you knew your horse best good chance you took the decision at the right moment. I believe that we intuitively know when it's time to say goodbye and let them go. The most horrible decision to make and it leaves grieve and scars.
We owe it to our animals though for all the joy they gave us and I am sure both your dog and horse are grateful for your strenght to take the decision.
Jos
Member:
frances

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 5:18 am:

Julie, I can only add my heartfelt condolences to those above. What an unbelievably terrible thing to happen to a young horse, and to his loving owner. Erika's link on Potomac does sound like a possible cause and would explain why your other horses were not affected.

Try not to torture yourself; you did everything right.

Hugs
Member:
imogen

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 7:10 am:

Julie
I'm so sorry for your loss. You did everything you could. Don't feel bad about grieving for an animal.

Best wishes

Imogen
Moderator:
DrO

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 8:53 am:

My condolences Julie,
It certainly sounds like you made the right decision to me. There are many possibilities here that range from the many causes of inflammatory bowel disease to a displaced bowel. I do NOT think PHF is likely mainly because it is not endemic to NC and however from a clinical sign standpoint it does not typically cause bloody diarrhea. If I had to guess it sounds like a bacterial colitis but that is just a guess. For a complete list of infectious and toxic possibilities see Diseases of Horses » Colic, Diarrhea, GI Tract » Diarrhea in Horses » Initial Evaluation of Colitis in Horses.
DrO
Member:
julieh

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 9:11 am:

I really appreciate everyones thoughts and concerns! Although I will probably never know what took Little Mac's life, his memories will always remain special in our hearts. Of all the horses we have, he always seemed like he just enjoyed life the most. Always had a skip in his step and a smile on his face. Thanks again for all your support, ideas and concerns!
Member:
maggienm

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 10:18 am:

Oh Julie, how tragic. You did everything you could do.
It is so frustrating to not know the cause. Allow yourself to grieve but don't stay there.
This is a time of cloudyiness, but this too will pass.
Member:
lilo

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 10:55 am:

My condolences, Julie. Keep the memories of Little Mac alive and don't torture yourself with "what if".
Lilo
Member:
gwen

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 11:02 am:

I am so sorry, Julie. I do not envy the situation you were in. You did the best you could with what you knew. Don't beat yourself up (much easier said than done, right?).
Member:
sureed

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 2:33 pm:

Julie,

We make these decisions for our animals because we love them. As hard as these decisions are, it is our responsibility to make them. A selfish decision would be to let our animals suffer when there is no hope. You did everything you could. You made a selfless decision, the right decision, and a loving decision. I am so sorry for your loss and for the anxiety of not knowing what caused Little Mac's illness. Please find peace knowing you did what was best for him and that you made his brief time with you joyful and full of love.

Suzanne
Member:
sunny66

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 3:56 pm:

Julie, I'm so sorry, I have no words of wisdom, just wanted to send you some ((((cyber hugs))).
Member:
leilani

Posted on Monday, Aug 11, 2008 - 4:11 pm:

My condolences Julie. Leilani
Member:
freshman

Posted on Tuesday, Aug 12, 2008 - 12:28 am:

So sorry to hear about your loss.

I may have missed this, but did your vet submit any fecal cultures? Seems like it would make sense to suspect salmonella, e. coli, clostridium, etc.

I'm sorry to hear that your vet did not think that a necropsy would be worthwhile in this case; honestly, this doesn't make sense to me.

In any case, please know that you did everything possible to help your colt. Colitis is a devastating thing in horses, and it sounds like his case was acute and very severe. I am so sorry for how much this is hurting you right now.
Member:
leslie1

Posted on Tuesday, Aug 12, 2008 - 9:58 am:

I hope you feel our collective thoughts and prayers... and they bring you comfort. I am so very sorry for your lose of Little Mac.

L
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